You need to be this tall to read today’s GMB. Weather Cloudy, 71, and eh. Useless information for the KISS fan in your life Pinocchio was made of pine. 30…

Peanuts. Popcorn. Get ye’r cold beer here. Weather Rainfall warning for Bristol, Bath and Northeast Somerset; Bedford and Blackburn. Oh sorry, that’s the Bristol, England area. Sun and clouds mix with…

Welcome to Friday. Please stand clear of the doors. Weather Supposedly partly cloudy and 75 with a 20 percent chance of rain. We’ll believe when we see it. Conspiracies to…

This is the day that the Surgeon General warned you about. Release the hounds! Weather Cloudy, 79ish, an isolated shower and generally blah. Useless information to impress your bratwurst guy…

Fear not, it’s only Tuesday. We’ve seen this day before in many forms and conditions. Weather Partly cloudy and 84. Hey now! What to watch At 10:35, a harvest moon,…

This is not a drill, Monday is here, sound the alarm. Ahooga! Ahooga! Weather High near 78, maybe 77 or 76. If things go south, we are looking at 75…

Congratulations, we all made it to Friday. Weather 85 and mostly sunny. Good news at last The city of Bristol reports no dogs were eaten overnight by immigrants. Things are…

It’s Thursday, so welcome aboard. Weather Sunny and 83 fun filled degrees. A Public Service Announcement from the City of Bristol The city of Bristol urges residents to keep their…

Welcome to Tuesday and enjoy your stay. Weather 75 luscious degrees and plenty of Sun for everyone. Thoughts & prayers Pray for New York Giants fans. It is going to…

Science! Weather Sum, clouds, 76ish. Maybe an early evening shower, maybe not. Maybe a late afternoon volcano, maybe not. Who knows? Things the GMB staff heard over weekend  “For the…

Freshest if read before noon. Weather Around 80 and mostly sunny. Sounds like a cop out kind of like, “my wife borders beautiful and is mostly pregnant.” For those keeping…

Thursday made fresh. Weather 81 and sunny. Buy! Buy! Buy! Useless information to impress your brake guy Halley’s Comet will next appear in 2061. From the desk of Plato “Good…

And action! Weather If you had mid 70s and sunny that’s a BINGO! Useless information to annoy the snob that dismisses talking to you It would take 10,368,000 ping-pong balls…

Welcome to the GMB. We provide tissue options, turndown service and world-class mints. Weather 77 and plenty of sunshine for everyone. Cha, cha, cha! California faces its greatest wildfire danger…